Brandner seeks to apply the same philosophy when raising her children. She explains that allowing her kids to embrace who they are is vital to her, hoping to spare them from the unnecessary pressures of meeting the expectations of others.

“My job as a mum is not to mould my kids. My job is to allow them to explore who they are and define who they want to be so they can freely express themselves,” she says. “If it makes them happy, who am I to stop them?”

She likens herself to a mother bird who holds its chicks in a nest until they are ready to fly. “I am just there to strengthen their wings. When it’s time for them to fly, they should be able to,” says Brandner. “They should be able to make their own mistakes. If I stop that, then I am only robbing them of important learnings and growth that only mistakes teach”. 

The most important part of her role as a mother is to be there for her children throughout their successes and failures alike. “I will be there when they get disappointed, but I will not attempt to shelter them from being sad or angry because this is how it is in the real world,” she says. “For the longest time, I shielded away from these emotions because I was under the impression that they’re not productive, or not lady-like, but in reality, these emotions play a big part in the way we process our experiences. I had to teach myself to sit with these emotions and occasionally lean into them”.

According to Brandner, there is no easy way to process sadness and anger; so she came up with a formula for her children: “There’s beginning, middle, and end. It visits you. When you’re done being angry, we can talk about it. Don’t bottle it up”.

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Brandner has always been interested in human behaviour, which eventually led her to explore life coaching. For those who are out of the loop, a life coach reframes and re-shifts clients' perspectives during consultations. She explains that a life coach always intends to push people forward. “Life coaching is forward-thinking. The goal is to stop and question thought patterns, behaviors and habits that limit our clients’ current perspective and see a new way forward to achieve their desires. Coaching is more forward-thinking. Based on what the learnings that unfold in the conversation, we create actions or steps to meet our clients’ goals—whether it is to become a better parent or a better version of yourself, or maybe transitioning from one job to another”.

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She shares that she spends most of her time reading self-help books, talking to friends on a deeper level, and observing people in general. “I am very introspective,” she reveals. 

Between 2020 and 2021, Brandner attended a 12-month programme based in Boulder, Colorado. “I did that when I was pregnant,” she shares. Despite dealing with her fluctuating pregnancy hormones, Brandner said she was motivated enough to attend meetings that would usually happen from 10pm to 4am. 

The program was divided into two parts—first is “clearing” potential life coaches of personal issues that might get in the way of coaching. “It was a real journey inward, to get to know ourselves. We learned about our belief systems—the good and the bad, our habits and how they impacted our behaviours. In this part of the program, we also learned distinctions on effective communication, moods and emotions, our human tendency to judge based on our personal experiences, and more.” 

The second part is “art and science of coaching”, where they were taught the importance of understanding human behaviour and psychology from a data-driven and scientific standpoint. “But at the same time, knowing when to put those distinctions aside and focus on staying fully present with our clients. How to deeply and actively listen and pay attention to nonverbal cues,” she explains. “Holding a coaching conversation is a lot like a dance. There’s an art to knowing when to step in and challenge our clients and when to just hold space and allow our clients to feel safe to explore their thoughts.”

Brandner’s job as a life coach is to deal with emotions that are not her own, and while the role seems easy to take, she admits that there are times when it feels more difficult than usual. 

“People come to me and say, ‘Oh, isn’t it draining listening to people’s drama?’ and [I’d say] I learn from every conversation I have with my clients, and no matter how different we all seem to be, at the base of it all is our desire to feel seen and heard. And it’s always inspiring for me to witness my clients shift their energy when they’re given that space,” she says.

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The life coach explains that while her consultations start a little heavy, clients would always find a way to tap into their “inner wisdom”.

“At the end of our sessions, I love seeing my clients’ eyes light up differently as they discover new possibilities for themselves. It’s like their spirits get recharged. And that, for me, is such a special thing to witness. Our day-to-day experiences can sometimes dampen our spirits, and I feel coaching somehow assists in brightening the path.” 

“Confidence is an action,” Brandner says. “Embracing your imperfection is so much easier said than done.” For the beauty guru, the self-acceptance process always begins with compassion for oneself and realigning one’s goals and perspectives. “It’s a matter of where you focus your energy”.

Brandner shares a routine that she does every night: It’s called the ‘acknowledgement practice’. Before going to bed, she writes three things she is grateful for. By doing this, she feels as if her brain is “rewired” and ready to see the good in every situation. “Just take the time to pat yourself on the back and say, ‘I did good today’”. For her physical well-being, Brandner shares that all sorts of movements are welcome. “Even if it’s just walking 30 minutes a day,” she says. “I also do yoga, pilates, tennis, and dance with my kids. I love outdoor activities”.

“Instead of replaying the things that went wrong in the day, “Just take the time to pat yourself on the back and ask, what did I do today that I’m proud of? And maybe follow it up with ‘I did good today”.

As for her beauty regimen, Brandner says that investing in skin care therapy and products are important to her. “My secret is Facial Care Centre (FCC). It’s one of the things in my calendar that’s non-negotiable. I block them off the way I block off an important meeting. Of course, taking care of yourself is a holistic approach, but let’s be real, there are days when we don’t feel well, don’t get enough sleep, or have enough willpower to eat right— and this obviously will reflect on our skin. That’s when my treatments with FCC can come in handy. When I feel my skin needs a bit of a boost and I need a little help externally. No shame in getting external help,” she discloses.

“Sometimes I feel bloated and I have an event, or sometimes I simply just want a confidence boost–that’s when I go to FCC and treat myself to my favourite treatments like Sublime Star. This procedure, no-fail, gives me that subtle snatch immediately after each session. I also love that it’s non-invasive, so it’s my time to fully relax and get some much-needed rest. It’s the best and I always leave the centre looking and feeling rejuvenated”.

Brandner likes to define self-care as a process where one feel’s rewarded. “Self-care is a word that is overused. When we hear it, we often think about waking up early and worrying about activities that are not necessarily fun for us. But skincare and having a nice treatment is something to look forward to, right?” She asks. “For me, self-care is something that I do not only to motivate myself, but also reward myself after a long day or week”.

She adds that a person must always work on “premium energy”. “When you’re restored, imagine the level of clarity that you will be operating on,” she says.

The beauty aficionado believes there is nothing selfish about investing in oneself. She also asserts that more people should work on self-acceptance rather than dreaming of different versions of themselves. “Confidence is accepting the current state that you’re in, rather than thinking about this future version of yourself you will love. We all have lines and little marks here and there, but that’s what makes us interesting. I think nothing is more beautiful than a woman who has fully accepted her imperfections”. 

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