Cover From modern-day career priorities to rising costs of living, what are the biggest factors leading Malaysian couples to be childfree by choice? (Photo: iStock)
From modern-day career priorities to rising costs of living, what are the biggest factors leading Malaysian couples to be childfree by choice? (Photo: iStock)
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From modern-day career priorities to rising costs of living, what are the biggest factors leading Malaysian couples to be child-free by choice?
In September, actress and beauty entrepreneur Selene Gomez made the headlines with the announcement that her ongoing health conditions prevent her from carrying a pregnancy safely.
The former Disney star opened up about this in an interview with Vanity Fair, adding that she took time to grieve over the reality of not being able to bear her own children despite having plans to start a family at the age of 35. The 32-year-old star, who has openly discussed her battle with lupus and mental health challenges, did not mention a specific medical issue.
Though Gomez remains hopeful about becoming a mother someday through either adoption or surrogacy, her story highlights the complex decisions women face today regarding family planning, influenced by personal health, career aspirations, and broader societal expectations.
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In Malaysia, similar conversations are taking place, but with a different focus. As the country’s fertility rate continues to drop, many young married couples are choosing to delay childbirth or even forgo it altogether. This decision is often driven not only by health constraints but by shifting social and economic dynamics and the rising costs of childcare and education.
For instance, the Credit Counselling and Debt Management Agency in Malaysia (AKPK) estimates that the costs of raising a child today could go as high as RM1.37 million once he or she completes university.
For modern Malaysian women, greater access to higher education, career opportunities, and financial independence has redefined the traditional family structure.
While this trend reflects the evolving role of women in society, it also raises concerns about the long-term implications for Malaysia’s demographic future. Where once large families were the norm—often not by choice but due to a lack of reproductive options—the scenario has drastically shifted.
Today, discussions around the decision of having fewer children, or choosing to be child-free entirely, are becoming more prominent among modern Malaysian couples. With the introduction of modern contraception and increased educational opportunities, women have been able to establish careers, contribute to household incomes, and rethink traditional family structures.
Smaller family sizes are now seen as a mark of social progress. But with this development comes new challenges, including the pressure to balance career and family aspirations, gender biases in society and the workplace, and a lack of support for working mothers.
Against this backdrop, policymakers are increasingly concerned about the long-term implications of Malaysia’s shrinking fertility rate. Will incentives alone be enough to address these shifts in family planning, or is a more comprehensive societal change needed to reshape Malaysia’s future?
Above Discussions around the decision of having fewer children, or choosing to be child-free entirely, are becoming more prominent among modern Malaysian couples (Photo: Unsplash)
Discussions around the decision of having fewer children, or choosing to be child-free entirely, are becoming more prominent among modern Malaysian couples (Photo: Unsplash)
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“The economic benefits of women joining the workforce also pushed policymakers to ensure women can do so without neglecting their small children,” says Dr Choong Sim Poey, founder member and advisor at The Reproductive Rights Advocacy Alliance Malaysia (RRAAM).
“Women becoming joint wage earners also made smaller families desirable and encouraged the education of women. Despite incentives like offering more affordable childcare services or tax allowances for children, bias against employing women within the fertile age groups persists, although studies have shown that over the long-term, women are equally or even more productive than men. Thus, some women are willing to avoid or postpone childbearing in pursuit of a career,” he adds.
“Other women are prevented from joining the workforce because of traditional family values, particularly amongst conservative Muslims. They are thus the exception in continuing to have larger families. The cost of higher education may be another barrier, particularly problematic for Malaysian parents who are considering higher education abroad for their children. As for problems of subfertility, services such as IVF (In vitro fertilisation) are available but expensive, and can perhaps be subsidised,” Choong says.
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In Southeast Asia, the additional pressure on couples to have children is often brought on by traditional societal expectations and religious beliefs. Childless married women, for instance, are often reminded that their biological clock is ‘ticking’, while young mothers are casually pressed by well-meaning relatives on when their next child is on the way.
All in all, there seems to be a growing gap between the expectations placed on women to have children and the support and incentives available to help raise those children. As someone once aptly put it: “Everyone wants you to become a mother, and when you do become a mother, no one helps you.”
Above In Southeast Asia, the additional pressure on couples to have children is often brought on by traditional societal expectations and religious beliefs (Photo: Unsplash)
In Southeast Asia, the additional pressure on couples to have children is often brought on by traditional societal expectations and religious beliefs (Photo: Unsplash)
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According to Choong, the emancipation and changing roles of women in society have created a natural push-back in spite of these pressures. “As gender rules become more fluid, it is now more common to find the woman as the breadwinner of the family thus mitigating against having more children,” he shares.
Ultimately, the decision to have children—or not—remains a deeply personal one, shaped by complex factors such as career ambitions, financial stability, and societal pressures. While modern women are gaining more autonomy in choosing their life paths, the persistent lack of structural support and lingering gender biases reveal that true reproductive freedom is still a work in progress in our nation.
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Previously contributing to Esquire Malaysia, Expat Lifestyle and Newsweek, Tania oversees digital stories across Tatler’s key content pillars, also leading the Front & Female platform exploring issues and topics affecting women today.
