12 books that explore motherhood, mother-child dynamics, and bonds that boost and those that burn

Part fiction and part memoir, On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong is an epistolary novel containing the letters that a Vietnamese American son wrote to his illiterate mother. It explores honestly and brutally the concepts of race, class and masculinity, all tied together with the undeniable love between a single mother and her son.

Ocean Vuong's debut novel became an instant sensation when it was published in June of 2019, and spent six weeks on The New York Times’ list of best selling hardcover fiction. 

Michelle Zauner, singer and guitarist of American indie pop band Japanese Breakfast, offers us an intimate look into the challenges of growing up as an Asian American kid in the US during the 90s, of struggling to meet her mother’s high expectations, and her quest to reclaim her Korean heritage after her mother is diagnosed with terminal cancer. 

This brilliantly written memoir, which has spent 67 weeks on The New York Times’ bestselling list of hardcover nonfiction since its publication in April of 2021, will make anybody cry—and not only in H Mart. 

Burnt Sugar, published in 2019 by Avni Doshi looks at the toxic love story and fraught relationship between a mother and daughter. 

It tells the tale of Antara and her mother Tara who, as a restless young woman in 80s’ India, became so enthralled by a guru at a local ashram (a religious retreat) that she neglected her baby and eventually abandoned Antara and her loveless marriage. Years later, Tara develops dementia and Antara is faced with the responsibility of becoming the caretaker to a mother who never cared for her.

Exploring emotions of love and betrayal, this book toes the thin line between self-determination and selfishness, and reveals what binds these two women together.

While based on her own experience, Priya Joi’s book will surely resonate with millions who identify as second-generation immigrants in countries such as the UK and America, where—as the author writes in an Instagram post—“brown and Black folk have migrated to either for work or love, or just for a better life in some way”.

M(other)land: What I’ve Learnt about Parenthood, Race and Identity, published in March 2023, explores what it means to be a parent in a place where you and your family are the minority, and how personal and cultural identities intersect with motherhood. It touches upon insecurities children of immigrants may have about their appearance or from feeling “different”, and on reconciling the children’s multi-faceted cultural upbringing.

Girl, Woman, Other, Bernardine Evaristo’s eighth novel that was published in 2019, follows the lives and struggles of 12 radically different characters who are mostly Black and British women who are mothers and daughters, and it details the stories of their families, friends and lovers across time and space. Considered a celebration of Black womanhood, this 2019 Booker Prize winner shows a side of Britain we rarely see represented. 

Where do transgender and non-binary parents fit under the umbrella of motherhood? As a nonbinary, transmasculine (someone who was assigned female at birth but identifies as male) parent who has birthed a son, Krys Malcolm Belc tries to answer this question in his memoir, The Natural Mother of the Child: A Memoir of Nonbinary Parenthood. Using essays, photographs and legal documents, the book chronicles Belc’s experience of queer parenthood, and offers another perspective of what motherhood can look like. 

Struggling to raise a child who is divergent in some way? This experience is personified by Tiny, the protagonist of Chouette who gives birth to a baby owl named Chouette. Yes, you read that right; and she is committed to raising her child to be her most authentic self, despite her husband’s attempts to “fix” the owl child. And if that’s not confusing enough, Tiny’s owl lover with whom she had Chouette is a woman she’d met in a dream. Through a bizarre yet moving story, Claire Oshetsky explores motherhood in a way none of us have likely seen before. 

When the world’s leading female professional rock and ice climber Majka Burhardt learnt she was pregnant with twins, her whole world turned upside down. Could she still pursue extreme sport the same way? What would this pregnancy mean for her body physically? More: Life on the Edge of Adventure and Motherhood, published in 2023, is an intense and emotional epistolary memoir that explores motherhood, adventure, career and marriage, as well as the choices and compromises that come with it all.

Palestinian American author Etaf Rum’s A Woman is No Man is a fascinating yet heartbreaking work of fiction that touches on Islamophobia, intergenerational trauma and misogyny. The novel takes us inside the life of Deya, who was raised by her conservative grandparents in America after her parents’ mysterious death in a car accident. At 18, her grandparents give her no choice but to get married, and Deya realises she is repeating the history that her own mother lived through.

Everybody has heard of Pachinko: be it because of the many awards it has received or due to the Korean drama inspired by it or because it made it to Barack Obama’s 2019 reading list. Min Jin Lee’s novel follows four generations of a Korean family in Japan in the 20th century.

Parent-child relationships are at the heart of this story. This multi-generational novel starts with Yangjin, a Korean mother who emigrates to Japan and sacrifices a lot for her children. She is one of the first main characters in the book and how her children and grandchildren carry her legacy is one of the novel’s core themes. Barack Obama described Lee’s work as a “powerful story about resilience and compassion.”

You might also like: How author Min Jin Lee is taking a stand against racism

Mother-Daughter Murder Night is a cosy mystery that brings together a grandmother, a single mom and a teenage girl. While lighter than the other books on this list, Nina Simon’s debut novel explores the conflicts that arise when three generations of women are forced to live in the same house and how a mysterious death brings them closer.

The author took on this project when her own mother was diagnosed with cancer as a way to spend some time together. Simon writes in the acknowledgments section of the book that she had decided to write the story with someone like her mother—a tough, smart California businesswoman—as the hero. She and her mum brainstormed the story and the characters in chemo clinics and hospital waiting rooms. “I tell you the truth, she is simply the best”, Simon writes, dedicating the book to her mum.

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