Cover Kam Raslan, author of ‘Confessions of an Old Boy: The Dato’ Hamid Adventures’
Kam Raslan, author of ‘Confessions of an Old Boy: The Dato’ Hamid Adventures’
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Where Dato’ Hamid discovers how times have changed, as told to Kam Raslan
Somewhere on the North-South Highway. 2024.
The Grandson and I were driving to my old hometown, which I hadn’t been to for years. It’s not my home anymore if it ever was. But The Grandson was visiting from Los Angeles, where he works in the motion picture industry, and he wanted to take me on a trip down memory lane. Unfortunately, when you get to be my age, memory lane becomes a confusing place where you can easily get lost but you do fully understand that it’s a dead end. The Wife had elected to stay in KL because it was her mahjong day. I found myself staring at The Grandson as he drove us into the hometown. Goodness, it was like looking in a mirror at my younger self. Unlike his father, The Ayatollah, The Grandson and I share a desire to see the world, to be a part of the wider world, to be able to mix with anyone, anywhere. It is, in a way, a Malay thing.
“We don’t say things like that anymore, Grandpa.”
“Whatever do you mean?”
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“We don’t make sweeping racial generalisations. It’s not polite, and it’s not accurate.”
“Good heavens, next you’ll be telling me that I can’t say the Chinese are hardworking! Ah Cheong’s coffee shop was open twenty-four hours a day. I don’t think he or his family ever slept.”
Above Echoes of Legacy: Where Dato' Hamid discovers how times have changed
Echoes of Legacy: Where Dato' Hamid discovers how times have changed
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Unfortunately, Ah Cheong’s coffee shop shut down decades ago and was replaced by a “groovy” café, where The Grandson ordered an oatmeal latte. I don’t know what oatmeal is, but I imagine it’s the sort of dregs people had to eat during The War. And the café was blasting out an infernal noise that young people call music. “I think we’d better take you somewhere where you’ll feel more at home, Grandpa. Let’s go to the graveyard.”
“That’s not funny.”
In the shadow of the grand mosque lay the graves of all my home state’s royal family, even some of the ones the British didn’t approve of. I went straight to see my HH. Everything I have I owe to him, and I’m very fortunate he never forced me to pay him back. Right outside the main royal enclosure lay my father, a commoner. We spread flower petals and water on his grave and said our prayers.
“We were never close, my father and I. We could never talk like you, and I do. It would have been horribly embarrassing if we had. How times have changed.”
“Did you love him?”
“I admired him. Our whole world revolved around him. He was a rock. Absolutely steady. Yes, I loved him, but in that old-fashioned way, with distance. I was a disappointment to him, but he truly adored your grandmother, even though she’s Eastern European. They were always whispering about me and shaking their heads. She was the son he never had.”
“I’m not close to my father. Maybe it is a Malay thing?”
I looked at The Grandson approvingly. It seems we can still say these things. Just beyond my father lay his father.
“My grandfather collected taxes for his Sultan from the tin miners in the 1880s. Nobody knows how he did it because it must have been very difficult squeezing money out of the towkays. I never knew him.”
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As we descended the slight slope to a once grand but now dilapidated tomb, I found it difficult to walk a path I had taken many times before with ease and understood that I would never visit again.
Above Excerpts from ‘Confessions of an Old Boy: The Dato’ Hamid Adventures’
Excerpts from ‘Confessions of an Old Boy: The Dato’ Hamid Adventures’
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“I don’t know, I never thought about it. Somewhere in Los Angeles, I guess. I don’t mind being buried here. It’s very grand.”
“We won’t be buried here. I lost that connection a long time ago.”
“So where will we be buried?”
“I’ll show you.”
Our graveyard is only a short drive away, completely full and essentially abandoned. The Grandson guided me through the minefield of fallen branches, anthills and collapsing graves until we reached a raised marble grave surrounded by five smaller graves.
“This is my mother, and these are my brothers and sisters. They all died at birth. I am the only one that survived.”
I don’t know what happened, I had been calm in the car, the thought never crossed my mind, but I suddenly burst into tears. I sobbed. Uncontrollably, and I pride myself on controlling my emotions.
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“I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.”
“And this is my great-grandfather, a man entirely shrouded in myth. He could talk to crocodiles and command them to leave, his keris could fly at night. I have a photograph of him. He looks like the cleverest man who ever lived. I think he was born around 1860. These three men are the only commoners in this graveyard. It was a great honour for them. Where will you be buried?”
“That’s okay, Grandpa.”
“I’m now twice the age she was when she died but I miss my mother.”
I reached for The Grandson’s hand and squeezed it as hard as I could, which at my age isn’t very hard.
“I am your connection to these pasts. It’s not a Malay thing, all pasts are different in their own way, but it’s our thing. You’ll be buried in Los Angeles, but you’ll also be here. Please tell your children.”
“Oh, I forgot to say, my girlfriend left me.”
“Again? I think she’s trying to tell you something.”
“It’s not the same girl. They are different girlfriends.”
I regained a measure of control over my emotions.
Above The front cover of the reissued edition of the book
The front cover of the reissued edition of the book
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“Do you see these two empty spaces next to my mother? That’s where your grandmother and I will be buried. My father left strict instructions and a lot of money to make sure that we would be buried here. I used to be resentful that I could never be beyond his control but now I’m very grateful for his foresight.”
“And his love?”
“Yes, I suppose so.”
It was getting late, and the dusk birds were beginning their flight.
“Shall we go back now, Grandpa?”
“No. Let’s stay a while longer. You’re right, I do feel at home in a graveyard.”
Unfortunately, the dusk mosquitos were emerging in full force.
“On second thought, your grandmother’s mahjong game will be finishing soon. You go ahead, start the engine, and get the air-conditioning going. Let’s get back to KL.”
I did stay a little longer to say goodbye to my mother.
This is a work of fiction by the author of ‘Confessions of an Old Boy: The Dato’ Hamid Adventures’, Kam Raslan. Dato’ Hamid is the fictitious leading character of the book which chronicles the vibrant life of the retired civil servant. Dato’ Hamid is known for his witty and frank storytelling. Initially published in 2007, a reissue of ‘Confessions of an Old Boy: The Dato’ Hamid Adventures’ in January 2024 attests to its enduring popularity. Fans of Dato’ Hamid can look forward to a sequel published by Penguin SEA at the end of 2024.
Credits
Images: Kam Raslan
Photography: Fady Younis
Location: St Regis Kuala Lumpur Astor Bar
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