Malaysia Day 2022: Dr Jezamine Lim and Vanessa Chong Share About Life in an Interracial Marriage

Having both grown up in mixed-race households, husband and wife think that there are still people out there who feel that marrying outside of one’s culture or religion requires a lot of effort. They beg to differ.

“It’s a common misconception that things get more difficult when dealing with other races," says Harith. "We as Malaysians need to move on from merely tolerating one another to celebrating one another. It's a lesson we hope to pass down to our three children as well."

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Lim adds: “Of course, it’s not all a bed of roses. The weird thing is that, apart from the differences in race and age, we’re also quite different in terms of our personality and outlook. However, I do believe we perfectly complement each other—he is more creative and laidback, plus tends to approach life in terms of concepts. I’m more focused on tangible results and ruled by facts. When the going does get tough, we each have to take a step back and look at the bigger picture, to remind ourselves why we are together."

Vanessa Chong and Murali Dharan Marimuthu (better known as Moots) have been married since 2011, and also enjoy celebrating a host of festivities together. Hailing from a mixed-race family herself, Vanessa enjoys the best of two—or more—worlds.

“I adore sarees, and have had so many passed on to me. I’ve also always loved Indian food, so having a mother-in-law to pass on some of her awesome recipes is just the best,” shares Chong.

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The couple only openly announced their relationship after they were engaged and they were very grateful to have supportive friends and family around them. “Our families are open and great, and having extended family members in various parts of the world also allow Caela (their daughter) to learn and experience more,” Marimuthu explains.

“Any marriage, regardless of race or religion, needs a lot of work and understanding—there are always compromises and both parties have to work through things together,” Chong states.

Marimuthu adds: “I have to thank our parents from either side, who I believe have managed to bring us up right. A lot of our values come from our parents, including our acceptance of other cultural and religious beliefs.”

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There's no issue about celebrating each other's cultural festivals. “There's a common misconception that you have to choose," says Marimuthu.

"You can do both and embrace each other's cultures. One shouldn’t be afraid to make mistakes and ask questions when it comes to learning about the other's culture,” Chong chimes in.

The couple shares that they complement each other well and that it's important to be able to the things they love, whether it's together or separately. “We’re also extremely happy that Caela represents the best of our cultures and family,” Chong smiles.

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