Cover If Anant Ambani and Radhika Merchant’s pre-wedding bashes have you wondering about the rituals involved in Indian wedding, Tatler has got you covered with our complete guide (Photo: Getty Images)
If Anant Ambani and Radhika Merchant’s pre-wedding bashes have you wondering about the rituals involved in Indian wedding, Tatler has got you covered with our complete guide (Photo: Getty Images)
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If the Ambani wedding slated for July has you wondering about what exactly happens in an Indian wedding, Tatler’s Indian editors are here to guide you through the multi-day extravaganza
If the upcoming Ambani wedding has piqued your curiosity about what goes on across the multiple days of an Indian wedding, you’re in luck. Whether your Instagram feed has been taken over by picture-perfect shots of Anant Ambani and Radhika Merchant’s pre-wedding bashes or if you’re wondering why your Indian friends need a full week off to tie the knot, Tatler’s Indian editors are here to guide you through the fabulous, flamboyant and fantastically unforgettable experience of a Hindu Indian wedding.
Forget the brief Saturday afternoon vows followed by a quick dinner and dance. Indian weddings are an elaborate series of events with their own unique customs and rituals. We’ve prepared a rundown of the essential dos and don’ts for navigating these vibrant Hindu wedding ceremonies with finesse.
Read more: Everything you need to know about the Ambani wedding
Mehndi ceremony
Above The mehndi ceremony is a must in Indian weddings (Photo: Getty Images)
The mehndi ceremony is a must in Indian weddings (Photo: Getty Images)
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Held a day or two before the Indian wedding, the mehndi ceremony involves applying intricate henna designs on the hands and feet of the bride and, in some cases, the groom. It’s a fun, familial event accompanied by singing and dancing. Yes, just like they do in Bollywood movies.
- Colours to wear: Opt for vibrant yet light colours like yellows, greens or blues that reflect the green/brown colour of the mehndi or henna.
- Sartorial choices: Women typically wear casual or semi-formal Indian attire such as kurti (long, loose-fitted tops) with leggings or sarees. Men can choose a kurta-pajama (loose shirts that extend to the knees). Comfort is key, as you might sit for long periods during henna application.
- Jewellery: Keep it minimal. A nice pair of earrings is usually sufficient. Don’t wear a bracelet or ring as you would have to take it off during henna application.
- Food: Canapes are usually served.
- Gifting: Gifts are not mandatory at the mehndi ritual, but if you choose to bring one, items like scented candles or small jewellery pieces like bangles and jewellery made of flowers for the bride can be appreciated.
- Faux pas: Avoid overshadowing the bride in your fashion choices or disturbing the henna application process. Also, only the bride’s henna art extends to her elbows, so don’t request the henna artist to apply the henna to your elbows.
Haldi ceremony
Above Family and friends put turmeric paste on the bride and groom in this ceremony that is an integral part of Indian wedding (Photo: Getty Images)
Family and friends put turmeric paste on the bride and groom in this ceremony that is an integral part of Indian wedding (Photo: Getty Images)
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The haldi ceremony is a pre-wedding ritual that is both fun and symbolic, usually taking place on the morning of the wedding, or a day or two before. The paste used in the ceremony is made from turmeric, sandalwood powder, rosewater and other natural ingredients, and has antiseptic properties while aiding as a traditional facial for the couple.
- Colours to wear: Clothes in shades of yellow, white, cream, or pastel can be worn.
- Sartorial choices: Simple clothes that you won’t mind getting stained. Women can wear old sarees or salwar kameez, and men can wear old kurtas.
- Jewellery: Avoid wearing precious jewellery as turmeric can cause staining.
- Food: Light snacks and drinks are usually served after the ceremony.
- Gifting: Not the norm usually, but if you wish, small, thoughtful personal gifts or organic wellness products can be considered.
- Faux pas: Wearing expensive clothes is impractical, given the messy nature of the haldi ceremony.
Sangeet
Think of this as a mini-concert or dance-off between the two families and the couple’s closest friends ahead of the wedding day. It’s a night where both families perform dances and skits, celebrating the union in a festive, light-hearted manner. And in turn, getting to know each other better.
- Colours to wear: Bright and festive hues like magenta, royal blue and red are popular choices.
- Sartorial choices: Glamorous Indian attire is recommended. Women can wear ornate sarees or lehengas, while men might wear a sherwani or a fancy kurta.
- Jewellery: This is the perfect occasion for statement high jewellery. Large earrings, bangles and necklaces are all appropriate.
- Food: Typically a lavish spread with both vegetarian and non-vegetarian options.
- Gifting: Usually gifting doesn’t happen on this day, so if you have an invite just for the sangeet, drink and dance without worrying about the gifting.
- Faux pas: Drinking excessively or being overly boisterous during performances can be considered disrespectful.
Wedding day
The main wedding day is a spectacle of rituals and emotions. And it starts with the baraat. The groom’s grand arrival on a horse or elephant, accompanied by dancing and music, is a sight to behold. This procession quite literally involves the groom arriving like the knight in shining armour to sweep his bride off her feet. This is then followed by the wedding rituals. Conducted under a canopy of flowers called a mandap, the wedding rituals begin. Key moments include the jai mala or exchange of garlands, kanyadaan which translates to giving away of the daughter, saat phere, which involves taking seven rounds, each standing for a vow around the sacred fire, and sindoor daan which is the application of vermilion to the bride’s hair parting. The ceremony ends with vidaai—an emotional moment when the bride bids farewell to her family and throws back handfuls of rice to signify prosperity and the repayment of her debt to her parents.
- Colours to wear: Rich, vibrant colours like saffron, purples, and royal blues are ideal. Avoid white, black and red. The colour red is usually reserved for the bride.
- Sartorial choices: Formal Indian wear is mandatory. Women should wear a full-length saree or a heavy lehenga, while men should choose a sherwani or a formal kurta with a Nehru jacket.
- Jewellery: Elegant and substantial—think gold, diamonds, and precious stones. The bigger the carats, the better.
- Food: Multi-course meals are common, with a mix of regional Indian cuisines and Western delicacies.
- Gifting: Monetary gifts in an envelope with the couple’s name and your name are standard. The amount should cover the cost of your meal, at a minimum. Be aware that in keeping with tradition, the couple or their family might initially refuse a gift up to three times before accepting it. This custom is rooted in a desire to appear gracious and not greedy. Therefore, it’s considerate to persist and offer the gift at least three times.
- Faux pas: Wearing overly casual attire and upstaging the bride can be considered disrespectful.
Reception
Typically held by the groom’s side of the family, this ceremony is one of the more relaxed events in an Indian wedding. It serves as a formal introduction of the bride to the groom’s community. The newlywed couple typically stand on a stage to receive the guests and take formal pictures. At the end of the ceremony, speeches are made by the couple’s closest friends and family to end the festivities.
- Colours to wear: Dark, sophisticated colours like navy, emerald green or metallics are popular.
- Sartorial choices: Haute couture all the way. Evening gowns for women and suits or tuxedos for men should be ideal for this occasion.
- Jewellery: Chic and elegant; less traditional and more modern styles are acceptable.
- Food: Usually an extensive buffet with international and Indian dishes.
- Gifting: Similar to the wedding, monetary gifts are appropriate unless your invitation mentions “blessings only”.
- Faux pas: Make sure not to arrive too early as receptions often start late.
